Whats on My Mind

Its High Time Swati !!!!

A few adjectives about today’s Swati..short-tempered, irritated,lazy,tired,worn out. Yeah ..thats me. I do not know why I am getting increasingly short tempered and I am always irritated.

I have got the most loving family in the world.My husband is a sweet heart and he loves me more than I can expect.He cares for me and helps me with daily chores.He respects me as a person and is concerned about my health and career. Can I wife ask more ?

My son , one year old , cutest baby in the world (you know ..mum’s will be mum’s).Can a Mum ask for more ?

My parents , love me so much and my mom calls me daily to ask my well being.Can a daughter ask for more ?

I have got a decent job and they pay me well for what I do and I have hardly worked late or on weekends. Can an Employee ask for more ?

So why the hell I am so irritated and short tempered. If only, I knew the answer.But after reading SM sometime back I felt may be I am not the only one. Probably I felt she could read and write my mind out.

Now , my little Aryan is growing up and next week , he will be One ! Though I never liked myself for my behaviour , but last week I realized that its high time , I should something about it.I was as usual irritated and shouted at my dear husband ,when Betu was in my lap.Aryan looks at my angry face and asks me ..”uuh ?”(All his questions are “uuh ?”, in a typical questioning tone)I smiled at him , forcefully (coz ,I was still fuming) and he gave me a kiss after a kiss.His eyes were so concerned and he wanted to pacify me.Mad Momma wrote about this few days back , that we should watch our behaviour now and I realized it that day.

I know there are so many people who hate me for my behaviour ( like my maid) and so many who love me inspite of all (my parents and Anupam) and whom I have been taking for granted (I know I should not , hope its not yet late) but Aryan..will he grow up to hate his Mumma ? No, I will not be able to bear that.I should do something about myself.