How many times you have given board exams in your life.
I gave first board exams in class 10th. I remember the fear of unknown,the butterflies in stomach and the uneasiness and anxiety. It happened the same way in 12th. And then when I was getting married and when I was going to labour and then when I left Aryan in daycare for the first time.
Now I am going to give it the 6th time. Yeah next thursday my exams start.
Thursday 4th June 2009 will be important day in Aryan’s lifetime. Just another week when he starts his school. Cannot believe it at all , he will be going to nursery. I remember when he was just few months old and in a discussion my husband mentioned Aryan going to school , I was like “abhi toh bahut time hai , abhi kya sochna”. I was so wrong, time just flew by. No wonder he will be 21 soon ..yeah soon 😀
And so me being me , I am having uneasiness and butterflies in my stomach. Will he settle well , he took loads of time to settle in daycare. Will he tell pee and poo to his teachers ? Will he eat his snacks on his own or will they help ? Should I pack his snacks or let him have what the school provides ? What will he like better ? Will he be able to travel back in bus ?
A 100 questions in my mind. My mom told , “hota hai , pehla bacha school bhej rahe ho na” and laughed 🙂
I am just praying and hoping for best. Because I cannot really do much , he HAS to go school some day and that day happens to be next thursday.
Am I doing right things as a mom ? Is Aryan getting enough attention ? Is this the right way to react in such a situation ? Should I react to his behaviour or should I let him be him and wait for some days / some time / some months ?
Some of the hundreds of questions I ask my self yearly , monthly, weekly, daily and sometimes hourly. I am sure husband does that too.
Its now and only now that I realize how difficult it is to be a parent and raise your kids into good human beings. Its now and only now I realize what my parents would have gone through to make whatever they could from me.
I know , I know , I am not a master piece but then to make a normal , average human being with a positive attitude to life , love for family and non-destructive nature is enough an effort, is what I know now.
There are days when I just give up. I feel like I cannot do more ,I cannot handle his tantrums ,or cannot take care of him , play with him etc, I need to do what I want , sleep when I want etc etc. Yeah I sound like a horrible mom ..but then this is my blog and so I am confessing..take it as you like it.
But then I know that its not possible. Its a commitment for life , forever , till I die ,I have to be a parent and I cannot be irresponsible , thats not the right God has given to parents. Kids , husbands and wives can be irresponsible at times , but not parents , coz each of their actions reflect on their kids. Since my son is quite young as of now I have afforded to me irresponsible sometimes and husband did cover for me , but it will not be possible when he grows up.
Also its only now I realize the love of parents for their kids. How I can keep loving him always, even when he hits , bites ,scratches me in anger , why do I not hate him. Had it be anyone else , I would have never forgiven him/her, but I cannot hate him more than a milisecond. Yeah , I do, (I confess again) I do get mad and hate him for a milisecond when he is a complete brat , but never more than that. I wonder how many times I would have made my parents feel like that even when I was an adult myself.
I do not know why I am writing this post , I do not know what is the point I am trying to make. What I know is that I need to be patient , a lot more patient and a lot more responsible in life. I need to be a good parent, without being stressed out about it 😛
I also need to thank my parents , for being what they have been. They may not have done an excellent job(knowing what I am,myself) , but whatever they have done is not too simple to do. (And plus perphaps they have done an excellent job but I was not good enough :-P) Thanks mummy and papa !
Today is mom’s Birthday and thats whats special about this day !!
HAppy Birthday Dear Mom !!
And the good news is that my brother got a award from his company for outstanding performance for 2 consecutive years !! HR came home to invite with family for a party! Awesome , isn’t it ?? I am so thrilled.
My dear Bro , I know how much you have given in to get there , I remember your days of struggle and frustation and so it means a lot to me !! Heartist congratulations !
Love you always !
I sometimes tell Aryan that I will not talk to you , if you behave like this , usually when he is physical or is misbehaving badly. It works and he says sorry , kisses me and patches up within minutes. He really cannot bear me not talking to him and gets upset if I still don’t give in. And tells Anupam , “Mumma No Talking”.
So this time he has put in my shoes. His dada dadi left on Sunday and he is missing them badly. So much so that he was in a state of denial yesterday morning and told me to go to office , said bye and sat on sofa (where his dadu usually sits ) with dadu’s favourite news channel on and said “hum ghar rahenge , dadu saath”.
I had to literally make him believe that dadu has left and he has to go to day care. Later in the day , his care taker told me that he was a good boy , did every thing , eating , sleeping , playing nicely but did not speak to anyone :-O
I was surprised. Full day he did not speak. Thankfully , he spoke to me and was nice to me and Anupam in the evening. And we also obviously gave him all the attention.
But when I asked him to talk to dadu dadi over the phone , he said “NOOOO” , a big NO. I tried a few times , but it remained NO. He spoke to other relatives though.
I hope I can somehow explain my little one the law of living , life goes on ..
I have over 4 tags pending of the ones that I remember 😛 And let me do some before I forget these too 😛
This one ofcourse is a special one and I wanted to post it on mother’s day but somehow could not. Better late than never.
Puja tagged me for 5 things that Ilove about being a mom. Next, find someone to link to and tag – someone from my own country, if you like, but definitely someone from another country (let them know that you’ve tagged them!) – and link back here and HBM and leave a comment.
So here I go.
Holding my little baby close to my heart and smelling him , hearing the sound of his breathing and watching him peacefully sleep
The trust he has in me for anything and everything and the feeling of being wanted , rather MOST WANTED.
His unconditional love and the way he showers me with loads of kisses and leaves me overwhemed. His caring nature , the way he behaves concerned when I cry or get hurt or am visibily not well.
His antics , his talking and his doing / saying new things everyday and leaving us smiling and surprised.
The joy of feeding him. Not only when he was too young and clinged to me to be fed but even now. I enjoy thinking what to cook for him , what to cook that he would love , enjoy and would be healthy as well. I feel on the top of the world when he says “Yummy hai” , “Tasty hai” and “Acha hai”. I do get frustrated for sometime when the effort go in vain but I am glad that the enthu to experiment for him has not yet died.
And I do not know whom to tag since most of the moms have done it already.
I am not a very quick kind of person when it comes to social networking etc. I am not on any social networking site except Orkut and I am not too active there as well. But Twitter is the buzz word all around. Yeah even in office everyone is talking about it , every one means EVERYONE !
I have heard enough that twitter is the fastest growing phenomenon on internet and that twitter is getting popular each passing second and the latest one , that Twitter is a threat to google ! (Watch the video here)
So I thought to give this one a try ! And to add to Twitter’s popularity and user base 🙂
Lets see if I enjoy this one ! Wish me Happy Tweeting and let me know if you are tweeting as well !
P.S : Thanks to all of you for your support ! Mom’s operation went fine and she is back home. Plaster would remain for a month or two. And she(rather they , my entire family) is cancelling her trip to Bangalore , which was due end of this month 😦
…to know that your mom is in hospital and you cannot go.
…to know that she will have a surgery (minor it may be) the next day and you won’t be around.
…And to have your bratty little kid around (in his terrible Twos) and you close your day with a big speech to him , on how he should be a good boy.
My Prayer on the next day to mother’s day is
God please grant some patience to me , lot of good health to my mom and little wisdom to my son !
P.S : Mom fell down in bathroom and has got her wrist fractured and is undergoing an operation as I do this post.
P.P.S : Belated Happy Mother’s day to All!
1st May 2009 – Woke up early and headed towards Thekkady after breakfast.Reached Thekkady at 12.30 PM.Checked in at the resort (Periyar Meadows), left little disappointed at the location of the resort , it was right in the city so no view from balcony , though it was good from inside.
After lunch at a not so good restaurant(Krishna) near by , we reached the Periyar tiger reserve , only to discover that there was a big queue for tickets. To add to it , it started drizzlin as well.Suddenly it clicked to me and we called our travel agent. He had promised that he would arrange the tickets and we would pay and he had forgotten about it convieniently and so did we. So when we called , he arranged tickets in 30 minutes. It was only 2.30 and the next boat ride was due at 4 PM. So we loafed around , had some tea / ice creams , clicked some snaps and waited.
Aryan who was scared as well as thrilled from the speed boat ride previous day , was double minded about going in a boat. He was saying “boat no” at times but was excited at the sight of boats as well. Since we were planning to go in a steamer ,bigger and higher than a speed boat , I told him that we will go in a small ship and not boat. And he was happy and pacified.
There was lot of pushing and rushing to enter into the boat. But once seated we enjoyed the lake ,the weather and the birds resting on the naked tree trunks in the lake. In the name of animals , we saw wild dogs , wild pigs , wild buffaloes and deers , all from too far to really differntiate , had the guide not told who was who. We also spotted some seals , who were playing quite near by.
Over all , we cannot say that we enjoyed the ride to a Tiger reserve since we hardly spotted any animals but we definitely enjoyed the ride.
Free from tiger reserve at 5.30 we went to the local market , again exlored and bought some spices. Bought a sovieneir for home , explored local handicrafts. Came to the resort by 7 PM , rested and slept early.
2nd May 2009 – Again we woke up early. Aryan enjoyed sitting in the balcony. Started from thekkady at 8.30 Am to Alleppy.On the way we saw lot of cardomom , pine apple and rubber plantation ,spotted a little bit of coffee plantation as well. As soon as we entered Alleppy we were thrilled looking at water all around. It was an amazing sight , a road between the water , cocout trees standing tall with water all around , pieces of land and people happily leaving around water, small bridges for pedestrians to cross water canals. Venice of India , I would call it !
Can you spot cardomom flower !
You know what this is !
We boarded the house boat at 12.30 PM. A house boat in true sense. Tiled bathrooms ,proper kitchen , two double bedrooms(My in laws accompanied us) , a dining table , a TV , an AC and a sofa , what more do you want in house.
Boat started moving in no time and our journey to explore Venice started. Boat halted for lunch after an hour and a we had a good spread of simple homely , yet yummiest lunch of the trip. After lunch we started the journey again. We were amazed to see houses ,banks , offices , cars , bikes and what not in small pieces of lands surrounded by water. We noticed that people use small boats called dingris to travel from one end to another. There were bigger boats to tranfer cars to the roads. There was police station and police patrolling in a steamer. The drinking water was tranfered in sintex tanks , laid on the dingris and pilled by the steamers. How life goes on , anywhere and everywhere !
Boat halted again at 5.30. We captured sunset in back waters. Had yummy dinner and slept sound in our big cradle.
3rd May 2009 – Woke up early for sunrise! Boat started at 8 AM. We checked out by 9 AM and started our journey to cochin. Cochin was near by and we reached there by 11 AM. It was too hot and humid. But we could not leave the charm of visiting a beach. Spent 1 hour at Cherai beach & collected some sea shells 🙂
We had pizza for lunch since all decent restaurants were closed. It was funny , how the city was closed it being a sunday !. Reached railway station at 3 PM though the train was at 5.00 PM. Our tickets were not confirmed and so we wanted to reach early. Got 2 confirmed and 2 RAC. Boarded the train only to realize that there was no pantry in the train and so we ordered food. Aryan started asking for food from 6.30 PM. Had a tough time with him , making him eat whatever food items we were carrying and pacifying him. Got the other tickets confirmed by 9 PM. But Aryan wanted to sleep on top berth and we had 2 top ones but on the side. So had a slightly tough night sleeping on the side birth with Aryan.
4th May 2009 – Reached home at 5 in the morning.
Hey All , Back from a 4 days trip to kerala and I have so much to tell that one post would be too short for it.
Let me see how far I can get.
Disclaimer : Some details won’t make sense to you but I want to write them for a record 🙂
28th Apr 2009 – We planned to take a train at 9 PM after office and booked a cab for 6.45 PM (as adviced by everyone) but cab did not turn up till 7.15 PM inspite of blasing them every 5 minutes. We managed to get 2 autos(some how in triple rate) and loaded our luggage and see what , the cab appeared suddenly ! Finally we hurried to the station got in the train 10-15 minutes before time. Phew !
Train ride was pretty smooth except that Aryan refused to share the berth with me and that left me sitting for 2-3 hours.
29th Apr 2009 – Reached Cochin at 8 in the morning and had some yummy breakfast at Udupi and I liked Kerala sytle sambhar :-)Drive to Munnar was beautiful. Enroute we saw 3 water falls , not much water though due to summer. Had some fresh carrots , strawberries , Red bananas , coconut water and pine apple.
Some Green Spices on the way, preserved in vinegar
A Water fall – less water due to summers
I had never seen so much of tea plantaion. The resort(T & U) in Munnar was beautiful with lots of flowers all over. After our bath we headed out for lunch (Mahaveer Restaurant) and went for sight seeing soon after. But in the town of Munnar everything except the market closes at 4.30 PM since its usually cold after that.
So we ended up th the town market.It was a so typically hill station kind of market with a difference. There were no shops of local handicrafts. All the shops were selling tea and spices , loads and loads of them. So after some window shopping we came back and enjoyed the garden in the resort.Had candle light dinner in resort and slept nicely.
The famous Kerala Parantha being made !
30th Apr 2009 – Day 2 in Munnar ,I so much wanted to see the first rays of sunand hence I had put an alarm in one of our mobiles for 6 AM. The alarm rang but I realized it was dark.So we ordered tea and after tea also it was dark.Then something buzzed in Anupam’s mind and he saw the watch. It was only 5 AM. The alarm rang in the other mobile 😛 and looks like Aryan had put the alarm while playing with my phone.So Anupam went back to sleep while I justed passed time and went down around 5.45 AM , only to realize that sun rises right in the opposite direction and there is no chance I can see sun rise. Anyways I enjoyed the mist , birds and flowers and loafed around in the park for 30 minutes.
The day was full of sight seeing and fun. Headed to Top Station soon after breakfast , followed by Kundalay dam , echo point and then Mattupatty dam. Did some speed boating there and throughly enjoyed that. Aryan enjoyed as well but got scared towards the end as the boat took a sharp turn.
Had lunch (Munnar Inn) and then headed to KDHP Tea Museum. Saw an documentary (Old Mountains ,New Roads) about the histry of tea in Munnar, learnt some amazing facts about tea and saw a tea processing unit in function. It was an experience of its own, though photography was prohibitted.
Eravikulam national park was the next destination in the hope to see the endangered Nilgiri Tahr. We were not lucky to spot any though. But we enjoyed waling between the clouds , so much so you could not see 5 feet above you.
Some Orchids at a flower show
Came back , played in the resort and slept sound to wake up early for Thekkady.
Stay Tuned for Thekkady and Alleppey !