Parenting and related thoughts

May 25, 2009 at 12:43 pm | Posted in Mom, Papa, Parenting, Thoughts | 16 Comments

Am I doing right things as a mom ? Is Aryan getting enough attention ? Is this the right way to react in such a situation ? Should I react to his behaviour or should I let him be him and wait for some days / some time / some months ?

Some of the hundreds of questions I ask my self yearly , monthly, weekly, daily and sometimes hourly. I am sure husband does that too.

Its now and only now that I realize how difficult it is to be a parent and raise your kids into good human beings. Its now and only now I realize what my parents would have gone through to make whatever they could from me.

I know , I know , I am not a master piece but then to make a normal , average human being with a positive attitude to life , love for family and non-destructive nature is enough an effort, is what I know now.

There are days when I just give up. I feel like I cannot do more ,I cannot handle his tantrums ,or cannot take care of him , play with him etc, I need to do what I want , sleep when I want etc etc. Yeah I sound like a horrible mom ..but then this is my blog and so I am confessing..take it as you like it.

But then I know that its not possible. Its a commitment for life , forever , till I die ,I have to be a parent and I cannot be irresponsible , thats not the right God has given to parents. Kids , husbands and wives can be irresponsible at times , but not parents , coz each of their actions reflect on their kids. Since my son is quite young as of now I have afforded to me irresponsible sometimes and husband did cover for me , but it will not be possible when he grows up.

Also its only now I realize the love of parents for their kids. How I can keep loving him always, even when he hits , bites ,scratches me in anger , why do I not hate him. Had it be anyone else , I would have never forgiven him/her, but I cannot hate him more than a milisecond. Yeah , I do, (I confess again) I do get mad and hate him for a milisecond when he is a complete brat , but never more than that. I wonder how many times I would have made my parents feel like that even when I was an adult myself.

I do not know why I am writing this post , I do not know what is the point I am trying to make. What I know is that I need to be patient , a lot more patient and a lot more responsible in life. I need to be a good parent, without being stressed out about it πŸ˜›

I also need to thank my parents , for being what they have been. They may not have done an excellent job(knowing what I am,myself) , but whatever they have done is not too simple to do. (And plus perphaps they have done an excellent job but I was not good enough :-P) Thanks mummy and papa !

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16 Comments »

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  1. I remember what my OB had said when I was pregnant with Aparna and I’d happened to mention to my OB that it is the first few years that are tough. ONce the kids get physically independent then it is much easier on teh parent.

    She’d just smiled and said “Thats what you think. Take it from me – Parenting never ever ends. It is something you sign up for – for a lifetime. It is a very very long haul” πŸ™‚

    Yes – it indeed is a commitment of a lifetime πŸ™‚

    • She was so right !

  2. πŸ˜€

    I’m quite sure you are doing a great job just like how your parents did with you! πŸ™‚

    And yea, its a full time, no-holidays job – parenting… I se my folks doing it even now, every single day.

    • I hope so Pixie !

  3. could relate to every word u have written swati… parenting is a lifetime commitment from where there is no looking back but make sure u get ur time that will to an extent take care of these feelings

    hugs

    • Yeah I know …trying πŸ™‚

  4. Truly said… I am in the learning process…:)

    • All the best!

  5. hang in there, Swati, the tantrums can really shake you up. I’m not going to say it gets easier, I still write weepy posts abt it. but the good news is the wonderful moments will compensate for all the rest. just like he goes through lovely moments and dfficult ones, you will too, as a parent. you’ve just got to ride the tough ones out.

  6. you wont believe this.. i did the exact same thing.. wrote out a list of things that my parents did , and that i have to be grateful for.. things that made my life a very special place.. then, instead of posting it on the blog, i emailed it to them.. πŸ™‚

    • good πŸ™‚

  7. i know what you are saying *hugs*

  8. All moms are sailing in the same boat as you. Every single one of us. We are human afterall. In our parents defense, I can safely say that they were not as complex as us and never went through the same type of emotions. And the kids today are so different from how we were as kids. So while parenting then was tough, today it is a crazy thing altogether. I know Grandparents who are throwing up their hands in the air and saying: “in our times it was easier to bring up kids!” πŸ˜€

  9. Hey, been thinking too much? I know at times we get overwhelmed with the demands of motherhood and the overall parenting thing…and then one does wonder how our parents did it, and that too with far less resources than we have at our disposal!!
    Don’t worry about being a great mom, our kids don’t look out for that either….
    So…just chill !! hug your kid when you worry or think too much…it will all vanish into thin air …. (tried n tested nushka πŸ˜‰ )

  10. Hey, I am sure you are doing the best that you can… We have to take it easy after a certain point of time. I do have such moments when I wonder if its my incapability of getting Diya to walk/talk like other kids of her age, whether I am giving her complete attention (just like you mentioned), whether we are getting her appropriate toys, whether we are able to give her a good social circle.. it goes on and on… and then I stop myself. Its of no use re… You have to give yourself credit for bringing up Aryan the way he is now.. and I am sure all those irritating/anger phases are just that, and would soon pass…
    Take care..

  11. Reading the posts in your blog is just like reading my mind swathi…
    Aryan’s Mom


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